Chemistry

I am realizing that I have really good chemistry with my girlfriends who are bisexual.

There is something incredibly open and intuitive about women who understand attraction on many levels and with many people.  Perhaps this fits with my polyamorous bent--it means that we are compatible as friends in our sexual orientations.  By this, I do not mean simply gay or straight, but I mean an awareness of and comfortability in our sexual capacity.

By sexual capacity, I do not necessarily mean sexual behavior.  I am referring to a spiritual sense of being that extends to our understanding of our own sexuality and that of others.  It is, simply put, an embrace of others that happens on a human and emotional level.  It means a comfortability in our embodied presence--and this translates to very warm displays of physical affection that do not at all have to be sexual.

Visiting New Haven this weekend reminded me of all the beautiful souls that I mingled with in Divinity School.  People in the "real world" are more stiff and reserved.  I often feel a sense of tension when operating in that mode.  I yearn for a deeper connection that is fluid and transcends discrete interactions.  YDS was a place that embraced "all the feels."  I miss it.

I spent the day with a dear friend who was also visiting New Haven.  We have not seen each other since May of 2016, but we melted into a warm embrace as soon as I walked in the door of Atticus, a bookstore Cafe downtown.  People stopped their conversations to look at us with curious but approving eyes, but we continued our long hug.  That is the power of an embodied emotional connection.

We caught up over breakfast, holding hands at times and gazing into each other's eyes.  For those living in a binary mentality of platonic versus romantic, our behavior might be confusing.  But love is love is love is love--and that means that when you love someone, you enjoy them are the beautiful soul that they are, and they are not the object of selfish desire or careful distance.  You simply enjoy being together--on emotional, spiritual, and physical levels.

We went hiking up East Rock after breakfast, talking the whole way and sharing about things both painful and delightful.  We sat on a bench by Mill River and prayed.  I felt the Spirit move several times during the course of our time together--I get chills whenever God feels near.  We had lunch at a friend's house, and then I took her to the train station.  We parted ways not knowing when we'd see each other next--but confident in the power of staying in touch.

She went 2 hours south to New York city, and I drove the opposite direction, back to Boston.

I had a memorable day, and it tops even the best romantic date I've been on.