Six Months in Boston

It occurred to me today that on January 15th, I will have lived and worked in Boston for 6 months.

How does it feel?

I remember when I first got my new job, it just felt right to say yes and move up here.  Things had happened really quickly, and I did not have a whole lot of time to discern or ask my community for input.  So I made the decision (I was in Tallin, Estonia, when I accepted the offer!) and moved forward with it.

I was happy with my job title and pay, and I knew Boston was a nice city.  New Haveners seemed to feel as if I had moved up in the world by coming here.  I had never really wanted to leave New Haven after graduation--and missed it badly!--but one doesn't say no to an opportunity to live and work in Boston...

I was primarily concerned with finding a church and experiencing the spiritual dimension of the city.  Both desires have been difficult to fulfill.  Much harder than when I was at Yale, but not for lack of trying--I visited churches and small groups, and spent a lot of time in prayer about this!

Work has been good, but quite a different environment than Yale and Divinity School.   I have felt respected and appreciated, but I miss being a student.  I miss having the freedom and constant opportunity to think critically, speak subversively, and connect deeply.  I miss the progressive-ness and the privileged-ness of Yale--and the amusement and annoyance of being around brilliant, awkward people all the time.

Bostonians are honest, opinionated, and hard-working.  There's no bullshit here and actions speak louder than words.  The city runs smoothly and ideas materialize rather than evaporate--a nice change of scenery from the Ivory Tower.

In my heart, though, there's no place like Yale, where passion and logic intertwine and where narratives matter and facts fit into bigger pictures.  Where people of color and women speak up and challenge the establishment and are not expected to conform.

The Boston version of the Real World has been good to me, but it's also worn me down.  I keep wondering what it will take for me to feel like I belong here.

I went away for 2 weeks over winter break, and as of today I've been back for a week.  I have felt more connected to the city ever since, which is good.  How will 2017 be?

I'm still looking for a spiritual home and a ministry that's uniquely mine--well, God's, but given to me.  I'm giving myself time to figure out how long I'd like to be here.  And I'm going to invest in the things that I have been given--my wonderful roommate; good job; and the nice town in which I live.

Moving back to California is not out of the question, though, and my time at home over break showed me that I could easily do so.  It would mean giving up certain things--religion and race in the Northeast mean such different things, and I've learned a lot here and been able to exercise an amount of influence that is unique to this context--but it would also mean gaining conveniences--family, old friends, familiar surroundings, and warmer weather.

Not all seasons of our lives bear fruit.  Some require digging deep and pushing our roots down.  Six months into my time in Boston, I have not made many friends outside of work or felt connected to a church home.  But I've gotten to know myself better and been stripped of a lot of the things that make me feel alive--dancing, socializing, organizing, theologizing....

My identity must be in Christ alone, I've learned.  He is the sole reason for my existence, and other things--good things, like my role in the Kingdom of God--flow out of that primary relationship.  This, I believe, is the most spiritual of purposes for my move in Boston.  It's not quite what I expected, but our most important lessons in life often aren't, are they?